Accepted

I have been accepted to Southeastern Seminary, officially. I am so excited to move and begin a new chapter in my life, but a little scared. How will I pay for everything? Will I be a good student? Am I going to be successful in my new field? Will I find a job? I honestly don't know the answers to any of those questions, but I am finding that I can trust God and have faith that He works all things out. I find myself becoming overwhelmed at the lack of answers to such important questions, but I always find peace in knowing God has worked it all out already and I do no good by worrying. I have to trust Him.

Single...the story of my life

True Love Waits, but it's hard

Every great story—every story worth telling—is one of suffering and endurance and overcoming. Stories of those who faced insurmountable odds, but persevered to the end. I feel like my life is a story like that. Though I don't feel many would consider it worthy of the big screen, God considers ME worthy. As I go to wedding after wedding and receive baby shower invitations I grow a little more weary with my station in life. I am genuinely overjoyed for my sweet friends and the joy and happiness God is bestowing upon them, but it's hard to see so many receive what I long for.

I still go to bed alone and wonder how long the waiting will continue. I don’t have easy answers anymore (like I did when I was 20), but I can testify to a good God who is allowing me to suffer deeply, beyond what I ever thought I could. He is sustaining me with Himself, blessing me and giving me hope that one day He will grace me with a husband who leaves me absolutely speechless with his love and care.

My single years are sometimes unspeakably difficult. It doesn't feel natural or “right” to be single at 29, and yet I know I probably will be for several more years. I know I don’t have the gift of singleness, and while I continue to fight for contentment and joy, I am not at home in singleness.

I have to rest in knowing that He is doing what is best, even in the midst of great heartache and weariness in waiting. I see incomparable glimpses of Christ in this suffering. I have to choose joy, fight for my tender heart, nurture a hopeful spirit, and fix my eyes on Jesus,” after all...He is the only one worthy of my gaze.